Why do most women struggle with getting dressed? Subjectivity. We cannot be our own objective eye, an eye without bias or motive. We are littered with insecurities and self-criticisms that impede our objectivity.
It is difficult for us look in the mirror and kindly and accurately evaluate how we truly look. This is why, when scrutinizing ourselves in the mirror, we end up asking meaningless questions like, "Does this make me look fat?"
So what do we do when we have a closet full of clothes and nothing to wear? Most of us shop. We go out and buy something new every time an 'important' event rolls around (This is a whole other topic but let me tell you right now that every event is important- meetings, grocery shopping, dates, walking your dog… live 100% of your life not the 10% you spend in front of someone 'important'). This behavior is draining and expensive and adds to the 80% of your closet you're already NOT wearing. Not to mention you wear this new item constantly for the next month, get sick of it, and add it to the rejected section of your closet.
So what is my secret solution to all your wardrobe problems? DON'T LOOK IN THE MIRROR.
YES. Stay with me. I care so, so, SO much more about how you feel than how you look. Plus, should we work together, I do all the looking for you so all you have to do is enjoy how you feel. My 5 step Wardrobe Refresh will give you outfits that make you LOVE the way you look and FEEL the way you want.
Take a moment and think about your favorite outfit. I bet you wear it out of the house with barely a once over in the mirror. Why? You trust it. You've worn it before and you felt great wearing it. I bet if you go put that outfit on right now, and stand in front of the mirror, you will find more than a couple thing wrong with it. Why? When we scrutinize ourselves in the mirror out goes the trust and in comes the insecurities and self-judgement.
Follow my Wardrobe Refresh completely and I promise your entire world will change. No more piles of rejected clothing on the floor, running late for every social engagement, and shopping at the last minute.
These steps help you create your dream wardrobe. A wardrobe that feels great, allows you to get dressed in minutes and solves the unending question of “what should I wear today?” so your energy is reserved for family, fulfilling work, and fun!
Your Step-by-Step Guide to Ending Closet Meltdowns
Step 1: Make a list of your IDEAL FEELINGS- Write them down and post them in your closet.
Ideal feeling Exercise: Draw a line down a sheet of paper to make two columns. In column 1 make a list of your most favorite things to do. In column 2, next to each activity from above, write how that activity makes you feel. Circle recurring themes and make a list of your ideal feelings. You will reference this list throughout the process. For example, let's say vibrant is one of your ideal feelings and you find that your closet is full of dark colors; subtle shifts such as adding color, texture, and pattern will completely change how you feel and, in turn, the message you send to the world. Or maybe comfort is an ideal feeling but you have a closet full of jeans that don't stay up when you bend over. This process with change that FOR GOOD.
Step 2: EDIT YOUR CLOSET- This is not major surgery so take a deep yoga breath and hear me out. Set aside a couple hours to do these few things and your closet will feel brand new.
First, commit to pulling out every single item with a stain, unrepairable hole, smell, or sizing issue. These items go into a recycle pile. With a ruthless hand take a second run through and pull out all items that you have not worn in the past few years these go into a donate pile. We are practicing non-attachment during this step, you can do it!
Put on your best fitting undergarments and begin to try things on (Hint- you shouldn't be able to pull your bra straps up off your shoulder more than an inch or two.) How does the outfit feel in terms of fit? Do the straps fall down? Pants drag? Do you avoid it because there's a tiny hole in the shoulder? Make a tailoring pile and a knowledgeable tailor will make the necessary adjustments for perfect fit. Don't skip the tailoring! It's amazing how $20 worth of alterations can make you feel like a million dollars.
Step 3: PREP YOUR OUTFITS! (Do this step!)
Take out your calendar and look at the full week ahead.
Plan an outfit for each day whether you're working from home, attending an important meeting or grocery shopping.
Make sure each outfit is complete with all necessary components. Think undergarments, shoes, jewelry, and outerwear.
Hang all the outfit components together in your closet so getting dressed in quick and easy.
Step 4: Evaluate- this is MOST IMPORTANT step and the one I guarantee will give you a closet full of outfits you LOVE.
Each night when you hang your outfit back in your closet quickly evaluate how you felt that day. Were you comfortable (shoes walkable? pants stay up?) ? Confident? Productive? Energetic?
Write down what you observe because this information is pure GOLD. Applying this feedback to future outfits and shopping is what fills your closet with pieces you LOVE.
Apply what you have learned and have faith in how you feel. If you feel awesome in dresses, then wear dresses! Whatever you do, do not stand in the mirror questioning whether dresses make your legs look short or your stomach small enough.
Step 5: Purchase with purpose- I love David Wolf's quote about cleaning up your diet "The best strategy we've got is to just add the good stuff! Eventually it's going to crowd out the bad stuff." Your closet works the same way so don't stress if you're still unsure of what's left in there even after you've completed step 2.
Shopping online saves time and allows you to try items on with the contents of your closet- be sure that new items pair with at least 3 things in your current wardrobe.
When shopping sales, always ask yourself "would I pay full price for this?" When the answer is 'no' don't buy it! This will prevent you from buying many unnecessary items.
Your mantra for shopping is "quality over quantity" I 'd rather you have 5 outfits you feel amazing in then 25 'meh' outfits.
As you repeat steps 3-5 you will begin to fill your closet with outfits you love. You will spend less time crying in your closet and hardly any time judging yourself in the mirror.
What step are you MOST EXCITED to complete? Shoot me an email and let me know!! firstname.lastname@example.org
Have so much fun and remember I'm here when you need me!
P.S. Ready for me to deliver your dream wardrobe to your doorstep? Click here to take a peek at how it works!